In reflection, after my last post, I have felt the need to revisit and strengthen my commitment to follow the light, regardless of negative stimuli. It has been a difficult transition for me to go from a workaholic in a major US city to a retiree in a small town in the tropics of Central America. My expectations of life and relationships with similarly situated expats were unrealistic, I have learned. Shades of Peyton Place are alive and well here, sadly, as they are in the rest of the world. For our part, we have chosen quite consciously to take advantage of the opportunity to sink new roots in the rich, fertile soil here and sprout love, while shedding the fear, judgment and resentment of our pasts. It’s a lonelier path for sure, but for us personally, a better choice.
While in the supermarket the other day, I was rebuffed quite hostiley by someone I’d known fairly well, for no apparent reason. Since I hadn’t seen or talked to him in weeks, his source of anger clearly came from an external source. Even the checker was astounded by his outburst. When he refused an opportunity to sit down over coffee and mend the “fence”, I was saddened to my core. Unfortunately, that refusal to connect, heart-to-heart, has been our experience with far too many people here in this little slice of paradise. I don’t understand how or why people would prefer to hold on to anger and misunderstandings fueled by gossip and judgment rather than to search for common ground and love. So be it.
It’s hard to walk your talk…especially when some of the barbs are inflicted with such an intentional and even malicicous purpose. A test of my spirit came recently when K and I had the choice to offer a generous gift to a less than kind friend. My baser instinct reflexively said no. But my heart, together with K’s generosity of spirit, prevailed. We are happier and healthier for it, regardless of their lack of appreciation or even acknowledgment. Again, so be it. Each act of kindness makes it easier for us to continue to give freely, without expectations.
So, I am sending out love and light to all whose hearts are open and receptive. And especially to those whose aren’t. I encourage all of you to take a moment to hug those around you from a different perspective…pressing your heart (and your left cheek) to their heart (and their left cheek) to remind yourself of the power of love and the immediacy of the present. It may feel awkward at first, but like anything else, will become more natural with practice.
Namaste
Apr. 19, 2018
Judy Richter 