October is a big national awareness month…breast cancer awareness (pink), domestic violence awareness (purple), and yes, bullying prevention (orange). Of course, breast cancer awareness is a topic near and dear to my heart, literally and figuratively. I had a mammogram last week, and opted for the new, high tech HD version. It may or may not cost me an extra $75 dollars out-of-pocket, depending on whether my insurance carrier agrees to pay for this new technology that many of the “powers that be” (men?) do not believe should be covered yet? Even though it is waaay more effective in detecting irregularities than the old style mammos. C’est la vie. Oh, and ladies, they still really squish your boobs – it’s the same machine, just different software.
Hanging out in Superior Court yesterday to get an injunction brought home the frequency and horror of domestic violence, which is usually closely related to bullying. When I used to think of bullying, I would think of the Little Rascals, a show I grew up watching. The bully would always threaten, denigrate, push around, punch and steal from the weaker kids. And the “king” bully usually had his gang of mini-me’s hanging around on the sidelines, egging him on and even participating when ordered to.
So, what happens when bully kids grow up to be bully adults? They beat their partners and kids, emotionally and physically. Instead of stealing lunch money, they steal other people’s money and property because it is easier than making it on their own. They lie, denigrate, point fingers and scream to get their way. Because I guess they think that’s easier than earning respect and cooperation the way most honest, decent people do. I recall a scene in a movie I saw where a bullying father, who was furious that his teenager would not do what he demanded, actually berated her for failing at two suicide attempts. I was beyond horrified. That was some motivator, but I’m not sure for what?
It is so very hard for me to let go of the anger and harsh judgment I feel for the bullies in my life. But I know that I absolutely must make that effort every day in order to continue on my path to Grace. The ego would like to engage, even retaliate, but that does not serve my higher self. I am grateful to have a loving, kind and genuine husband who would never abuse me. I pray that everyone finds such a powerfully loving life partner.
Love and light.
Oct. 16, 2015
Judy Richter 